Well, phase one is over. Steve is taking K1 back to North Dakota this weekend, and we're all pretty mopey about it. These past few weeks with him have gone by so quickly ... it seems like we didn't get to do all of the things we wanted while he was here. I guess we thought we'd have more time.
Steve and I had been talking for a while about the boys coming to spend some time with us this summer. It took months of mental preparation on my part, as I had never met, much less spoken with, either of them. I had no idea what to expect, and I worried that they wouldn't like me, or I wouldn't like them, or that there would be some sort of horrible blowup about me from their mothers. I also fretted about the simple fact that -- hey, Steve has kids! I mean, I obviously knew that, but I had never seen him in the "dad" role. There were definitely some jitters.
We got K1 first -- picked him up at a Country Kitchen restaurant on the BFE side of Wisconsin. It was a bit awkward, what with it also being the first time I met Steve's ex-wife. I kept my mouth shut for lack of knowing anything intelligent/appropriate to say, while she kept her mouth shut for ... well, I don't really know why, she just did. Once we got K1 in the car and got on the road, things were better, though he was a bit sad at having to leave his mom.
An hour or two later, the two of us were getting along swimmingly. I think it had more to do with Ky's mad people skills, because I was still a nervous wreck. (I didn't want to mess anything up!) The kid has a way of putting you at ease. He's so damn smart and friendly ... he really is a special little guy.
Once he got me over my nervousness, we became instant buddies. There was one particular moment when he was experiencing some anxiety of his own about being away from home, and I got to help him through it. Other than the part about him feeling like crap, it was actually pretty cool. It was one of those moments when you realize that all the shit you've dealt with in life can actually be put to good use. It also sort of showed me what it's like to be a mom ... to be so concerned for a child, and the wanting so badly for him to feel better.
But now he's going home to his real mom. It's amazing to me how quickly you can start to love someone, even someone you've just gotten to know.
I'm really gonna miss that kid.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
Puke-A-Rific
Sorry for the time lapse between posts. It's been a busy week. I had to fill in for a vacationing co-worker, plus take on some unexpected additional duties at work. I was glad for it, because it meant I had something to do. Our managers still haven't gotten organized enough to give me my account list, so my days are very, very long and boring. Evenings, on the other hand, zoom by. I've doubled up on my master's classes, and it's proving to be tougher than I thought, especially with the kids here. There are days it's all I can do to not snap my laptop in half in sheer, unadulterated frustration. And that's saying something, because I love my lappy.
After work on Friday, we loaded up the boys and our bags and took off toward the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, Ohio. It was an okay drive, but all four of us were in foul moods by the time we made it to a hotel approximately four hours later. I couldn't get the "free wireless internet" to work, which stressed me out because I had homework due at midnight. K1 was not a bit excited about having to share a teensy tiny bed with N (can't say I blame him. I wasn't excited about having to share a teensy tiny bed with Steve, either. We have a king-sized mattress and plenty of wiggle room at home.)N was his usual "can I" "can we" "hey dad" "I want" self, and Steve was just a big cranky turd. Things calmed down after the turd exploded at K1 and we were all sentenced to a night of uncomfortable sleep.
Overall, the day at the park went well. It was the first time K1 and N had ever ridden a for-real roller coaster, and they were pretty wigged out about it. They sure picked a good one for their virginal ride ... it was one of those where your feet dangle and you go upside down a couple times. I'll admit it - I was a bit queasy when we climbed out of those seats. I haven't ridden a coaster in several years, but I've never had problems with nausea before. It wasn't too bad, and it went away after I sipped on a $3 bottle of water.
Seriously. $3 for water. Each.
We did a few more, then we hit this ride called the Corkscrew. It. Frigged. Me. Up. It was the roughest ride I'd ever taken, and I was feeling rather disoriented when it was over. I had to sit for awhile before I could do anything else. Once I recovered, though, things were okay. I refused to get on anything else that included anything remotely close to topsies and turvies.
We decided not to stay another night and instead drove home that evening. I suppose all the motion of the day had a weird effect on my body, because when I lay down in bed later that night, every ounce of me felt like I was still moving. Up and down, side to side, loop-de-loop. I rolled onto my side and just about lost my chicken nuggets, if you know what I mean.
Sunday was mass chaos. Steve's brother, sister-in-law and two young boys came over for a visit. Jake is 4, and Garrett just turned 2. I'm not sure, but I think it was the first time most of the boys had met each other. Did they ever hit it off. And by "hit it off," I do mean hit. My little house looked like a boxing ring. There was running. There was screaming. There was madness and mayhem. There was me, trying my damndest to not get pissed off at the running, screaming, madness and mayhem (I failed, by the way.) The kids had a blast, and I've been repeatedly told that that's all that matters.
The jury is still out on that one.
After work on Friday, we loaded up the boys and our bags and took off toward the Cedar Point amusement park in Sandusky, Ohio. It was an okay drive, but all four of us were in foul moods by the time we made it to a hotel approximately four hours later. I couldn't get the "free wireless internet" to work, which stressed me out because I had homework due at midnight. K1 was not a bit excited about having to share a teensy tiny bed with N (can't say I blame him. I wasn't excited about having to share a teensy tiny bed with Steve, either. We have a king-sized mattress and plenty of wiggle room at home.)N was his usual "can I" "can we" "hey dad" "I want" self, and Steve was just a big cranky turd. Things calmed down after the turd exploded at K1 and we were all sentenced to a night of uncomfortable sleep.
Overall, the day at the park went well. It was the first time K1 and N had ever ridden a for-real roller coaster, and they were pretty wigged out about it. They sure picked a good one for their virginal ride ... it was one of those where your feet dangle and you go upside down a couple times. I'll admit it - I was a bit queasy when we climbed out of those seats. I haven't ridden a coaster in several years, but I've never had problems with nausea before. It wasn't too bad, and it went away after I sipped on a $3 bottle of water.
Seriously. $3 for water. Each.
We did a few more, then we hit this ride called the Corkscrew. It. Frigged. Me. Up. It was the roughest ride I'd ever taken, and I was feeling rather disoriented when it was over. I had to sit for awhile before I could do anything else. Once I recovered, though, things were okay. I refused to get on anything else that included anything remotely close to topsies and turvies.
We decided not to stay another night and instead drove home that evening. I suppose all the motion of the day had a weird effect on my body, because when I lay down in bed later that night, every ounce of me felt like I was still moving. Up and down, side to side, loop-de-loop. I rolled onto my side and just about lost my chicken nuggets, if you know what I mean.
Sunday was mass chaos. Steve's brother, sister-in-law and two young boys came over for a visit. Jake is 4, and Garrett just turned 2. I'm not sure, but I think it was the first time most of the boys had met each other. Did they ever hit it off. And by "hit it off," I do mean hit. My little house looked like a boxing ring. There was running. There was screaming. There was madness and mayhem. There was me, trying my damndest to not get pissed off at the running, screaming, madness and mayhem (I failed, by the way.) The kids had a blast, and I've been repeatedly told that that's all that matters.
The jury is still out on that one.
Sunday, June 3, 2007
Life is now a cartoon
It's 11:28 p.m., and all four of us are sitting in the living room with our respective gadgets. Steve caved under pressure and took K1 and N to town to pick out a pair of iPod shuffles, and they've been entertaining themselves ever since. I hope we remember to screen them before we send the boys back to their mothers; I'm not quite sure they'll find the South Park soundbites quite as funny as "world's coolest dad" does.
I'll tell you what ... anyone considering having children should spend a few weeks with a couple of pre-teens. We've been doing a lot of family things lately ... buying clothes, playing in the yard and (gasp!) eating dinner around the table. It's been kind of nice. But there are parts of pseudo-parenthood that aren't so nice. Like how your living room and its contents are clean and in the proper places when you go upstairs to bed, but you come downstairs the next morning only to discover that Coca-Cola cans, vanilla wafers and bits of popcorn decided to escape the pantry and throw a rave. Or when you have to remind someone for the umpteenth time to turn off a light. Or when you unexpectedly reach a snapping point and you go ballistic on a 12-year-old for saying the word f***.
That happened to me today, and I still feel really bad about it. I'm not quite sure of my role in all of this ... am I a pseudo-parent or just the girl who lives with dad? It's all very confusing.
For the most part, it's been fun. We took them to Charleston yesterday and poked through the state capitol building and all the statues on the capitol complex. (I hope they learn to love West Virginia they way Steve and I do.) And it's cool watching them get to know each other and giggle at silly things. They're both good kids but in very, very different ways. K1 is such a gentleman. He has manners, a good sense of humor, incredible intelligence ... and he's darn cute to boot. You'll never meet a more respectful kid. N is kind of his polar opposite. He's kind of awkward and unsure ... most of which can be attributed to his age. Twelve-going-on-13 is rough. He just seems so out-of-touch with the realities of life ... but he tries so hard. So hard. You can tell he really wants to grow up and become a person someone can be proud of. But damn if he isn't goofy. At lunch yesterday in Charleston, Steve and I came up with an analogy for their personalities, which can be best described by this picture:
I'll tell you what ... anyone considering having children should spend a few weeks with a couple of pre-teens. We've been doing a lot of family things lately ... buying clothes, playing in the yard and (gasp!) eating dinner around the table. It's been kind of nice. But there are parts of pseudo-parenthood that aren't so nice. Like how your living room and its contents are clean and in the proper places when you go upstairs to bed, but you come downstairs the next morning only to discover that Coca-Cola cans, vanilla wafers and bits of popcorn decided to escape the pantry and throw a rave. Or when you have to remind someone for the umpteenth time to turn off a light. Or when you unexpectedly reach a snapping point and you go ballistic on a 12-year-old for saying the word f***.
That happened to me today, and I still feel really bad about it. I'm not quite sure of my role in all of this ... am I a pseudo-parent or just the girl who lives with dad? It's all very confusing.
For the most part, it's been fun. We took them to Charleston yesterday and poked through the state capitol building and all the statues on the capitol complex. (I hope they learn to love West Virginia they way Steve and I do.) And it's cool watching them get to know each other and giggle at silly things. They're both good kids but in very, very different ways. K1 is such a gentleman. He has manners, a good sense of humor, incredible intelligence ... and he's darn cute to boot. You'll never meet a more respectful kid. N is kind of his polar opposite. He's kind of awkward and unsure ... most of which can be attributed to his age. Twelve-going-on-13 is rough. He just seems so out-of-touch with the realities of life ... but he tries so hard. So hard. You can tell he really wants to grow up and become a person someone can be proud of. But damn if he isn't goofy. At lunch yesterday in Charleston, Steve and I came up with an analogy for their personalities, which can be best described by this picture:
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